Totally Fabulous
by AceOfSkullz
Summary: When Russia goes on a trip to visit China, leaving Lithuania free to do what he wants for three days of 'freedom,' he decides to go and visit Poland - but, of course, no day can be relaxing when Poland is involved. Rated T for language.


_Hey there, guys. :) I have just recovered from a four-month Writers' Block -fist pump- so I might be a little rusty. xD I wrote this story yesterday; it's fun writing Lithuania's and Poland's personalities. Anyway, here's a quick summary of this one-shot:_

_When Russia goes on a trip to visit China, Lithuania is free to do what he wants for three days of 'freedom.' Deciding to head over to Poland's house for a little relaxation, Lithuania hopes for a few days of respite from working for Russia - but, of course, when Poland is involved, nothing is relaxing. Rated T for language._

_Please review, and enjoy. :)_

* * *

_**Totally Fabulous!**_

The room was a mess. Scattered clothes, dresses, papers and pens littered the floor; the carpet was barely distinguishable over the clutter of clothing and ripped documents. Tripping and stumbling over the horrifying disarray, a young blonde man managed to maneuverhis way over to the kitchen. Hopping over strewn pots and pans, the nation gave a weary sigh. It would take a lot of cleaning to fix up this horrible mess.

Collapsing on a couch in the next room, the young man, obviously exhausted, gave a slight frown. Well, that was a total waste of time. Four hours of searching and searching for something special in particular, and all he had managed to find was a few pretty dresses that didn't seem to fit him anymore, some hidden horse food and a few photographs containing pictures of him and Toris before they had been separated by Russia. Treasured memories that made the country wish for the awesome days before the parting.

A whiny startled the man from his thoughts. Trotting towards its owner through the disarray, crushing small objects beneath its hooves, was a small bay pony. The nation gave a smile, losing the rare, near-serious look he wore before. "Yo, wassup, playa?"

The pony whinnied in displeasure, obviously not pleased by the mess. It butted its head into its owner's knees demandingly, as if to say, 'stop sitting there on your lazy ass, get up and clean this house! Do you expect me to live in such an environment?'

The country laughed and took the horse's face in his hands. "Bro-ski, you, like, totally need a bath." The pony jerked its head away from the young man, stomped its hoof and snorted in agitation. The blonde laughed, only to freeze immediately upon something catching his eye.

"Like, bro, what's that under your foot?" He tried to shove the horse backwards, which extracted a startled whinny from the pony. Instinctively his pet began to back up, revealing a rather tattered and crumpled black dress that had been dragged and stuck under the pony's hoof.

"O…M…G!" After searching for this particular dress for four hours straight, the country could barely believe his eyes. But immediately his confusion gave way to pride. "Like, look, playa. It's totally what I've been looking for." Grinning cockily, the man almost skipped over the mess and nearly burst through the door to the bathroom. As he closed the door behind him, the pony was just left staring, bewildered, after his owner.

Then, recovering from its surprise, it gave a whinny of exasperation. Just why was God punishing it by giving it such an eccentric owner? Shaking its head, the animal turned away from the bathroom and trudged its way into another room, unwilling to witness the peculiar after-effects of its owner's habit.

* * *

Poland stared at himself in the mirror. Pearl-white beads hung around his neck, glinting stunningly in the faint glow of the light bulb. His long blonde hair was neatly combed and straightened, falling like golden waves over his shoulders. He would have looked almost feminine and beautiful, had it not been for the torn and dirty black dress he had chosen to wear. The sleeves were ripped and tattered, the fabric smeared with mud and dirt. He looked quite ridiculous, standing there admiring himself in front of the mirror.

Despite the ragged appearance of the dress, Feliks thought he looked stunning. "Ah, yes. Don't I look, like, beautiful? Now for the nails…"

After painting his nails a hot pink, the polish man grinned. "They're, like, a total wicked hipster pink!" Making a mental note that he still had to paint his house such a color, Feliks finally applied the finishing touches of powder to his face. Stepping back and admiring himself in the mirror, Poland laughed triumphantly. "I look, like, totally fabulous!"

* * *

He was free. Free! Free to do what he wanted, how he wanted! Oh sure, it was only for a couple of days, and yes, he was still under the control of Russia, but it was rare for Lithuania to be able to enjoy a peaceful couple of days to himself. Russia often insisted of taking him and the other Baltics with him when he went on his trips, but, thankfully, not this time. Sighing with relief, the Lithuanian tried to contain his joy by singing a little tune in his head. _No more Russia, no more Russia, no more Russia…_

_Ah, but what to do? _Were his initial thoughts after a few hours of cruising around his country. After spending so much time under Russia's rule, he was used to abiding the Russian's every word and every command. _  
_Toris stretched, a silly smile slapped on his face. No matter. He'd figure out what to do. The best thing was that he was left to enjoy a few days of freedom. Estonia had already grasped his chance to escape Russia's house and go on a relaxing trip, while poor Latvia, the youngest, was forced to stay back 'home' and look after Russia's belongings and house. Lithuania almost felt sorry for the small nation, though he wasn't going to let the young child's misfortune spoil his few days of freedom.

_Ah…is this what independence feels like? Not knowing what to do? _Thinking hard, the Lithuanian thought of what Estonia was doing. The other Baltic was off to visit Finland, whom he shared a close relationship with. Lithuania racked his mind, wondering if he had any allies or close friends he could go and visit.

His first initial thought was Belarus. Maybe, just maybe, if he succeeded on going on a date with her…

But then he remembered – Belarus was with Russia, on their trip to visit China. Well visiting her was out of the question…

Upon being under Russia's rule for so long, Lithuania didn't have many allies or friendships. The thought made him sigh. He could probably visit America; after all, America had offered him a place to stay when he had fallen into poverty during World War 1. And he had taken the country up on that offer, right?

As if by some unspoken decision, Lithuania whipped out his cell phone and started dialing America's number. It would be a nice change from the surroundings of Russia and Lithuania. When he heard the voice of America on the receiver, Lithuania tilted his head and gave a small laugh. Wow…the ability to do what you wanted when you wanted without even having to ask…freedom really was wonderful…

"Ah yes, America! I was just wondering -"

"Hey, dude! Listen, bro, I can't speak right now. Check it, dude, Japan's totally kicking my ass at Mortal Kombat! Yo! How do you do that, bro?"

A softer, quieter voice echoed in the background: "I be badass." Lithuania guessed this was Japan.

"Dude, why are you such an asshole? You know you can't beat The Thunder! Just give up already, bro. I bet…"

Lithuania sighed and snapped his cell phone shut, sensing that he had lost America's attention anyway. Well it looked like he could cross visiting America off the list. The only friend he had left was…

"_Hey, Lithy.' Starting today, I'm going to make you my little slave." _The certain, cocky voice of a young blonde man rung in Lithuania's mind. The Baltic shivered, remembering his time with Poland; though he counted Poland as a friend, the country reminded him of Russia: Feliks often bullied and teased him. And on his weekend of freedom, getting pushed around by Poland wasn't a very appealing idea.

Still…there was no one else to go and visit, and he certainly wasn't going back to Russia's house. That would be madness! There really wasn't anything else to do, and Poland was…well…amusing company. Not exactly enjoyable. But not exactly impossible to bear either. Sighing, Toris opened his cell once again and began dialing Poland's number.

"Hey! 'Sup, Liet. Listen, you, like, totally called at a good time. Come over. Right now. Like, now. Totally. Catch you later. Peace!"

The Lithuanian, startled at how fast and one-sided the conversation had been, only allowed himself another exasperated sigh. Well now. It looked like his few days of freedom were decided. Shoving his phone back into his pocket, Toris decided to go meet Poland immediately. After all, there was nothing else to do, was there?

* * *

The doorbell's musical chime rung through the messy house. Striding up and opening the door, the Lithuanian smiled. "Hi, Poland. Nice to…What the hell?"

Catching sight of Feliks dressed in the tattered, ruined black dress, the Lithuanian could barely contain his surprise. He knew that Poland often cross-dressed as a hobby, but never had he seen him look so…ragged. It had to be that horrible dress he was wearing; the thing clearly hadn't been washed in months, and had so many rips and tears that it looked as though it belonged in the rubbish bin rather than in someone's wardrobe.

Poland, however, must have thought he looked stunning. Standing at the doorway, a cocky, proud look about him, the polish man grinned. "Wassup, Liet? You look, like, totally surprised. Didn't ya expect me to look so totally awesome?"

Laughing, the polish stepped aside, making way for the Lithuanian to enter into his home. "What d'you think of my new look, bro-ski? Huh? Do you think I, like, look totally cool?"

"You look like a homeless man dressed in a dress," muttered Lithuania, exasperated. "You dumbass. Get changed. You look like a fool!"

"Ha! You're just jealous!"

Deciding not to waste his breath on arguing, Toris relented and stepped through the doorway. "Whatever, Poland. I don't really…What the fu-!"

"Yeah, I was, like, kinda hoping you could, like, totally be a good friend and clean my house." Poland inspected his painted nails while saying this, allowing Lithuania to absorb the horrible disarray of the hallway. Books, clothes, paperwork and even Poland's pony, munching on some torn fabric it must have mistaken for hay, was crammed in the room. He wondered how a place could get so…so…chaotic!

Then reality hit. "Wait – wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. You just invited me over here…so I can clean your house for you? Why can't you do that?"

"I just painted my nails," replied Poland with a shrug.

Lithuania stared in shock at the polish man. So that's how he was going to spend his next few days of freedom? Cleaning up Poland's house until it was time for him to go back to Russia?

At the thought of facing Russia again the Lithuanian nearly fainted with fright. No, he couldn't let that happen. These next few days of freedom were precious to him. He wasn't going to give up his temporary independence just so he could clean that damn Poland's house. If Feliks wanted a cleaner house, he could tidy it up himself.

"No. No, you can do it yourself," he sighed, hoping to assert his authority.

Poland seemed surprised. "But Lithuania," he whined, showing him his painted-pink nails. "My nails!"

"I don't give a shit about your damn nails. Russia's just gone on a trip to visit China!" Exasperated, the Lithuanian gripped Poland's shoulders. "Do you know what this means?"

Poland thought for a moment, before giving a half-hearted shrug. "I dunno. And I don't really care."

Lithuania ignored the last part of the sentence and continued onwards with his explanation. "It means freedom! No more Russia for three days. I get to relax and do what I want. I can't just give that up just so I can clean your house." Hoping he got the point across, Lithuania turned back to Poland, who was just staring at him.

Lithuania sighed, waiting for the polish man to say something; really, it wasn't that hard to understand, was it?

Poland continued to stare.

Toris shifted awkwardly.

Feliks's stare didn't shift; it always remained on Lithuania's face. Toris's anger at being invited to Poland's house just to clean it was fading away to slight confusion and awkwardness.

Finally, Lithuania relented. He was never very good at asserting his authority. "Fine," he muttered. "I'll stay and clean your house."

Poland gave a little hop of triumph. "Yay!"

* * *

"_Hey, hey, Tato, won't you, like, gimme some Vodka_

_Hey, hey, Mama, hey, hey mama._

_The Żurek I ate so long ago,_

_I totally can't forget that taste!"_

"Would you please stop singing that damn song?" hissed Lithuania, hopping gingerly over the scattered piles of Poland's scattered belongings.

"It's my theme song," stated Feliks simply, grinning.

"It's annoying the hell out of me, so please shut up," the Lithuanian muttered, obviously frustrated.

Instead of abiding his wishes like a _true_friend would, the polish man remained oblivious to his comments and continued to sing.

"_Draw a circle, there's the earth!_

_Draw a circle, there's the earth!_

_Draw a circle, there's the earth!_

_'Cuz I'm Poland!"_

"Please shut up. I'm begging you," Toris nearly cried, picking up a book titled _How to Know If You Are a Cross dresser And I Love Nail Polish Guide. _Lithuania sighed and threw the book back into the many piles of other books and scattered objects, not knowing where to start.

"_Cultivate the earth,_

_Harvest the earth,_

_Providing for the nation, the earth_

_'Cuz I'm Poland!"_

"Well...where do I start?" the Lithuanian murmured, scanning the room for a suitable place to start cleaning.

"What about over there?" said Poland, pointing at a rather surprisingly huge mass of clothes. Well, it wasn't going to be easy, but it was a place to start.

The Lithuanian was used to working and keeping Russia's house spick and span, so cleaning was something he was used to. He had never, in his entire life, however, been forced to tidy such a muddled house. Russia's place had only required a bit of dusting or vacuuming occasionally. This place needed vacuuming, dusting, scrubbing, washing and a thousand other jobs he was too tired to list.

"Seriously, would it be so hard to help me spring-clean _your_ place?" sighed the Lithuanian, picking up and folding a few clothes and uniforms and placing them in a washing basket.

"My nails," Poland replied with a mischievous smile.

_Damn those nails of yours, Poland, _Toris thought, irritated by the blonde's attitude.

"Now let's, like, sing it in Polish!" laughed Poland cheerful, beginning his theme song once again.

Lithuania could only sigh and listen as Feliks sung joyfully about the earth.

"_Hej hej Tato, dasz wódki?_

_Hej hej Mamo, hej hej Mamo_

_Totalnie nie mogę zapomnieć smaku_

_Żurku, który jadłem kiedyś!"_

The hours passed. Lithuania's first day of freedom consisted of folding clothes, placing books and objects back in their correct places and dusting the polish man's shelf. Working for Poland reminded him of working for Russia, though it had a different feel to it; although Poland pushed him around and bullied him a lot, he wasn't nearly as abusive as Russia. The Lithuanian shuddered, instinctively placing his hand on his back. Beneath his dark green uniform were deep, ugly scars, received from Russia when he had done something to deserve a beating.

"Liet! Like, less thinking more tidying." Poland was observing his every movement, looking faintly amused. He was still dressed in his black dress, which was still as torn and ragged as ever. Sighing, Lithuania continued to work, hoping that he could be done with this job as soon as possible and still have a day or two of freedom left.

After a few more hours of Poland singing his theme song in multiple languages and a few more hours of Lithuania cleaning, finally Poland started a conversation.  
"You, like, totally need to come here and clean for me more often, Liet."

"Wonderful," the Lithuanian muttered. "I'll seriously consider that offer. It's not like I do enough slave work for Russia or anything."

Poland was either unaware or just chose to ignore the sarcasm in his voice. Either way, Feliks said, "We hardly ever, like, see each other anymore. We should totally hang out more often."

Lithuania slammed down the book he had been examining. There was a pained expression on his countenance, as if he was remembering a memory that brought him suffering. "Poland, remember when Russia split us apart? He defeated us, and was dragging me away to live with him. Remember what you said when I was literally shouting at you to wake up and help me?"

"Uh…no," said Poland, shrugging. "What'd I, like, say?"

"You just laughed at me and said that the look on my face was hilarious."

"Really? I, like, totally can't remember that," the polish man said with another shrug of his shoulders.

"Well, believe it or not, you did…And so I went from being pushed around by you to being pushed around by Russia." The Lithuanian tried to quell his shaking. "I doubt I'll never truly be fully independent now. I'm always going to be depending on Russia."

Poland cocked his head and stared at him. But before he could speak, Lithuania interjected. "You see, Poland, being Russia's slave is a lot worse than being pushed around by you. But then again, even if I leave Russia I'll get into some economic crisis and be forced to come crawling back to him. So there's really no point in hoping for independence, because it simply won't happen. I kind of long for the days when we were a part of the common-wealth. But I still wasn't independent then so it doesn't really matter does it?"

Taking a breath, Toris continued. "What I'm really trying to say is…I want my independence. And even if it's just a crazy dream, I'm going to keep trying to become independent. I don't need your help, or Russia's, or the other Baltics. I can – no, I will – become independent, no matter how impossible it seems."

Poland stared at him for a little while longer, before grinning. "I'm, like, gonna go make some coffee! Want some?"

"You really weren't listening to my whole speech about independence, weren't you?" Lithuania sighed, exasperated.  
"'Course I was," Poland laughed, winking at him. "And you know, even if you, like, hate me, it doesn't change the fact that I still totally like you."

Lithuania stared, confused and surprised, as Poland skipped his way out of the room. He hadn't expected Feliks to respond like that. He was usually rather selfish and care-free. But before he could ponder Poland's words, the blonde country returned with a cup of coffee. "Oh, I, like, totally think you're done, by the way."

Lithuania glanced around the room, and realized it was clean. There were still a few things that needed to be put in order, or placed in the correct place, and the house still needed to be vacuumed, but apart from that everything was much tidier than the state the house was in before.

"Wow…I guess I am," murmured Lithuania. Walking outside with Poland, who was still dressed in his bizarre dress, the Lithuanian lifted his head towards the sky and breathed in the fresh summer air. The sun was just beginning to set, casting its final peek at the world before allowing the moon to take over.

Lithuania's favorite time of day had to be the sunset. It signaled something ending, yet not permanently; just as the sun set at night it would always rise in the morning. It was a beacon of hope; a beacon that one day, Lithuania would become independent. Sipping at his coffee, the Lithuanian smiled, forgetting his troubles and worries of Russia and independence that clouded his mind and often affected his judgement.

"You know, Poland, I'm kind of glad I came here. It was a good break from Russia's house."

Poland laughed. "Like, totally tell that Russian-dude that if he doesn't, like, leave you alone then I'll make his capital Warsaw!"

Lithuania couldn't exactly imagine himself telling Russia that, but he allowed himself to chuckle at the comment. "Imagine if it did become Warsaw. Russia would have a heart attack."

"Russia would, like, totally freak out," Poland agreed.

Lithuania wasn't used to Poland acting like this. Usually he was so self-absorbed and selfish, but now he was acting rather friendly. Maybe Poland just had mood swings. He'd probably be back to his normal self tomorrow morning.

Suddenly Lithuania remembered a question that had been hanging in his mind since he had arrived at Poland's house. "Hey, Feliks – how did your house get so messy anyway?"

Poland grinned. "See this dress? I was, like, looking for it."

Lithuania looked confused. "You mean to tell me you were looking for that crappy dress?"

"It's not crappy," said Poland, somewhat defensively. "It's something, like, totally special to me. Remember when we were a part of the common-wealth?"

"Yeah?"

"Well I got it back then. It was, like, a present."

"From who?"

"From, like, you actually."

Lithuania nearly spat out his coffee. He had bought Poland a dress? Since when? He racked his mind, trying to conjure up a memory that explained such a notion.

"Yeah. It was, like, a birthday present." Poland stretched and gave a soft smile. "You, like, totally didn't know what to get me so you got me a dress. I really, like, liked it."

Lithuania rolled his eyes. "So you practically destroyed your house so you could look for some old, cruddy dress?"  
"It's, like, not cruddy," snapped Poland in defense.

"Well, it is now." Lithuania remained silent for a few more moments, before bursting out laughing. He didn't laugh very much these days, due to his unhappy lifestyle with Russia. Laughing wasn't something the three Baltics did in front of Russia, either. Whenever Russia was around, it was best to remain silent and to just obey his will. That way he didn't bother you too much.

Poland joined in, his sides heaving as he laughed. When the giggling and chuckling finally ceased, Lithuania stretched and drunk the rest of his coffee. "Honestly, Poland, I don't know who's stupider – you, for being so…eccentric, or me, for actually buying you a dress."

"I'm too awesome to be stupid, so it must be you," was Poland's mischievous reply.

* * *

_**Three days later**_

"Oh Great and Fearful Russia! I made you some tea." Carrying the tray towards Russia's room, Lithuania was rather disappointed to be back at Russia's mansion. After a few days of refreshment at Poland's house, despite still being pushed around by his polish friend, he had enjoyed himself immensely. Now he was back under Russia's command, his few days of respite and freedom now only a memory.

Latvia was glaring at him from the distance. When he and Estonia had returned, the young Baltic had made himself distant from the rest, shooting them withering glances when he thought they weren't looking. This was probably due to the fact that they had left him to look after Russia's house while they went off to enjoy themselves.  
Opening Russia's door to his room, Lithuania saw the silver-haired man sitting on his couch. "Oh, Lithuania. Nice to see you again. Please, come on in." The cruel, childish-like man was smiling; Russia always smiled, whether he was in a good or bad mood. It added to his creepiness factor.

"Oh…it's good to be back, Russia." Lithuania forced a smile. "I brought you some hot tea." Handing the man his cup of tea, Lithuania turned to leave.

"Hold on a second, my Lithuania." The Lithuanian halted, his back still turned to Russia, trying to force himself not to shiver.

"Yes…Russia?" he managed to choke out, the silver tray in his hands trembling violently as he tried to quell his shudders.

"Did you miss me while I was gone?" The Russian's eyes were fixed intently on Lithuania's back. Toris tried not to shrink under those sharp, intense eyes.

Slowly turning around, the Lithuanian forced a smile. "O…of course…"

Russia didn't seem satisfied with the answer. "And my Lithuania will stay with me forever. Yes?"

Lithuania's mind flashed back to the conversation he had with Poland. _"All I want is to be independent" _he had said. The Lithuanian gulped and nodded. "Of…of course."

Russia chuckled and tilted his head to the side. "Good. You can go now, Lithuania."

As Lithuania turned once again to open the door, he heard Russia's voice call out: "Oh – and don't tell the others this, but out of all the three Baltics you'd be my favorite."

Lithuania didn't turn back to respond. Rushing out the door, the Lithuanian leaned against the door frame, gasping for breath. Why did Russia's confrontations always scare the crap out of him?

Lithuania groaned. Dreams of independence, freedom, a life without Russia…what did it all matter? Russia would always be there. Russia would never let him go.

After all - fear of death is loyalty in Russia.

* * *

_Wow. That went from a humorous story about Poland's cross-dressing to an angst-y story about Lithuania's want for independence. o.o Poor Liet; I always felt sorry for him in the anime and manga. He's always pushed around by either Russia or Poland. :c _

_Lithuania and Poland are two of my favorite characters in Hetalia. xD They're personalities are just so...fun to write. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this one-shot. I'm sorry if it wasn't good; I've just recovered from Writers' Block so I'm still a little rusty. Please review. :) Bye,_

~Acey3


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